From goodreads: They had a pact.
Leave the world behind much as they had lived it.
No one would miss them. No harm, no foul.
Their personal demons would be left behind once and for all.
It was the only thing they could count on.
It was all she had.
Madison Hanson has spent the last four years being a “shadow.” Her parents ignore her. The students at her school stopped talking to her years ago, and the majority of her teachers forget she’s even there. In her desperate yearning to leave her invisible life behind, Madison makes a pact with her only friend, James Garrison, to end their lives as inconspicuously as they live them. No fuss, no muss. No one would miss her and she would miss no one. Their plan is set, and it’s all she can count on. That is, until fellow student, Mitch Peterson, beats them to the punch. Everything Madison believed in is shaken to the core when she watches the aftermath of Mitch’s death unfold. By taking his own life, Mitch unwittingly saves hers. What a selfish prick.
She is now left with the daunting task of living. Trying to bury her demons once and for all, and finally trusting someone with her fragile existence.
Living is hell.
Death would have been so much easier.
This review was a difficult one to write. I wanted to love this story a lot. Like A LOT. However, I found myself only liking it and yet I was disconnected when I finished reading it.
“Mitch wasn’t an athlete, he wasn’t a scholar, and he wasn’t a geek. He had been nothing but a shadow. A shadow like me. A shadow like James. The school didn’t lose a student they lost a nobody.”
Suicide. That one word touches me in a way that makes my heart hurt. Even before reading the book and only having read the excerpt, I was able to connect with the dark subject matter on a very personal and emotional level. Miss Me Not is the story about being invisible and feeling there’s no hope, ultimately the only solution is death. Suicide is that double edge sword, while it may bring peace to those who are looking for a way out but it also brings destruction to those left behind. Miss Me Not is that story.
Madison takes the reader on her dark journey and shares her thoughts in a way that makes you feel as though you are reading her diary. She’s consumed with feelings of self-loathing and sadness but she is not alone in feeling this way. She has a partner in crime, James who suffers equally. While they’re friends I didn’t feel a true connection to that friendship because their relationship seemed almost superficial. I was left feeling unfulfilled because I wanted to find out more about them, together as a team in their failed pact. I had a hard time in believing Madison’s pain because it didn’t seem to ring true. When you are reading about a character that is so despondent, those very intense feelings of melancholy should bleed directly to the reader and it didn’t. Also, the secret that she’s harboring shouldn’t be told in one sitting because something of that magnitude isn’t shared in that particular way. It felt rushed.
The reaction to the loss of the other student in the story could have been explored a lot more and Dean’s reaction to the situation seemed one-dimensional. That was a little disappointing because truthfully, no one can bounce back that quickly from a loss of life as it relates to suicide. There were moments throughout the story when I did become disengaged because I didn’t buy into the whole Dean and Madison budding friendship/romance.
Even though I had some concerns with the story there were things that I liked. The writing is excellent (regardless if I was unable to truly connect to the story), the subject matter was handled in a way that gave it the attention it deserved and while the pace of the story isn’t quick it was perfect for the topic at hand.
My final two cents: I did struggle with this particular book but I’ve heard amazing things about Tiffany King which means I will most definitely read other books written by her.